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The Ford Mustang, one of many products offered by the foundering automaker.






Ford CEO vows to drive to Washington as expensively as possible

by John Johnson, staff reporter

DETROIT, MI—Ford CEO Alan Mulally said Monday he would drive to Washington, D.C. for this week’s auto industry bailout hearings instead of flying in on the company’s private jet as he did last week. Since many considered it inappropriate to solicit government funds while arriving in such an expensive form of transportation, Mulally agreed to drive instead of fly. “Happy now?” Mulally asked rhetorically. “But just so you know, I’m taking the SUV. And I’m filling up with premium, you bloodsucking poundcakes,” he said of the American public. “Oh, not good enough for you?” he added mockingly. “Fine. I’ll rent a mule and a Sherpa to take me to D.C. That’ll shut you up. But it’s still gonna be the best damn Sherpa money can get.”

© 2008 The Teaspoon Times

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